Humorous Quotes

"I prefer women with a past. They're always so demmed amusing to talk to." ~ Lady Windermere's Fan by Oscar Wilde "History is merely gossip. But scandal is gossip made tedious by morality." ~ Lady Windermere's Fan by Oscar Wilde "It is absurd to divide people into good and bad. People are either charming or tedious." ~ Lady Windermere's Fan by Oscar Wilde "I can resist everything except temptation." ~ Lady Windermere's Fan by Oscar Wilde "Experience is the name every one gives to their mistakes." ~ Lady Windermere's Fan by Oscar Wilde "Ah, nowadays we are all of us so hard up, that the only pleasant things to pay are compliments. They're the only things we can pay." ~ Lady Windermere's Fan by Oscar Wilde You cannot make a man by standing a sheep on its hind-legs. But by standing a flock of sheep in that position you can make a crowd of men. ~ Zuleika Dobson by Sir Max Beerbohm But the dullard's envy of brilliant men is always assuaged by the suspicion that they will come to a bad end. ~ Zuleika Dobson by Sir Max Beerbohm "If you lived in London, where the whole system is one of false good-fellowship, and you may know a man for twenty years without finding out that he hates you like poison, you would soon have your eyes opened. There we do unkind things in a kind way: we say bitter things in a sweet voice: we always give our friends chloroform when we tear them to pieces." ~ You Never Can Tell by George Bernard Shaw "I have always said that the great advantage of a hotel is that it's a refuge from home life, sir." ~ You Never Can Tell by George Bernard Shaw